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B r e n d o n: Bobby and i were like 8 when this girl, Suzy Lee, she moved into the house across the street. She was lovely, but we didn't play with her, we didn't even talk to her. We were afraid to get a crush on her, fight over her. It's funny, but we even made a pact like... If one of us makes friends with her, he becomes a giant walking slimeball.

Never make friends with Suzy Lee!
Never make friends with Suzy Lee,
Or you'll become a giant booger.
Or you'll become a giant booger!

It was really stupid. Really. But me and Bobby were like best friends forever, so we didn't want to fight over some girl. But when i turned 16, my father got a job in another state. We had to leave. It was really tragic. But two months ago i got an invitation from Bobby... to his fucking wedding!

And i was really surprised and really happy for him.

Although he didn't mention the name of his fiancée.

So you already guessed who she was. Well i got back to Oak Hill, got to the place, and i saw a familliar face under the veil.

And i ran to him and i shouted, "What have you done, Bobby, what the hell have you done?!" He won't listen to me, he said it's gonna be alright. Then his skin started turning green, and he started really leaking out of his clothes, and then i told her everything, and she started crying, she was crying a lot, and in a half an hour Bobby was like Jell-o.


from The Mysterious Town of Oak Hill, released July 25, 2014



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